Better Than Flying
by Silent Swordmaster
Summary: After rescuing the young elf from the circus, she traveled with him, fought with him, and fell in love with him. She had thought that life would be unbearable without her wings. He set out to prove her wrong.
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

I counted out the gold we needed to spend the night and handed it to the innkeeper. After being locked up in a cage for gods know how long, I sprang for the comfiest beds I could afford. I spotted Yoshimo sitting at the gambling tables playing cards with a few other men. I admired his effort to get us some extra money but reminded myself that gambling usually ends in a net loss. Even so, I let him have his fun. I've only really cared about money when I start to run out.

Minsc sat in a chair playing with Boo, his hamster, on his lap. I had often wondered several things about Boo: where did he go while Minsc was fighting and how does such a big man like Minsc not squash a little creature like Boo even by accident? They were an odd pair to say the least.

Jaheira sat silently at the bar enjoying a mug of Evermead. I became curious, as it was the first time I think I'd ever seen her drink, and Evermead is some strong stuff. 30 gold for one mug! That's more expensive than a room! Still, if anyone deserved one, it was her. We found Khalid dead in the dungeon, his body eviscerated and torn apart, and Jaheira broke down and cried. After that, she went silent, and I suppose I need to figure out what to do about that.

I wished I had Imoen at times like this. She knows people better than I do and has a much easier time talking. Still, I'm not sure even Imoen could lift Jaheira's spirits. Imoen's gone, I thought to myself. I have no idea where the Cowled Wizards took her or that bastard Irenicus. I touched the sword strapped to my back. Sarevok's Sword of Chaos reminded me that I have power too, and I will use that power to get Imoen back!

"Jeffix?"

I turned around and saw her. Aerie walked up to me, a concerned look in her eyes. "Are you all right?"

In an instant, my rage cooled off and dissipated and I took my hand off the sword. "Yes...fine."

Aerie had only been with us a short time. We had just rescued her from the circus of illusions and her guardian (or uncle as she called him), Quayle, gave me permission to take her traveling with us. When I first saw her, she looked just like an ogre. Once the illusion was dispelled, however, she looked positively beautiful. Her skin was pale and fair and her hair golden and shining with small braids here and there. Here eyes were a bright blue that pierced me whenever I looked at them. I saw her soul in those eyes.

"Were you thinking about Imoen?" she asked.

"Yeah," I sighed.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"No, it's fine. Sit down with me please," I beckoned. "You'll be rooming with me by the way."

"What?" she exclaimed, her mouth agape.

"Is that a problem?" I asked. "I got three. One for Minsc and Yoshimo, one for Jaheira because I think it's best we give her as much space as possible right now, which leaves one for you and me."

"Oh," she began. "I'm sorry, Jeffix. I shouldn't have reacted so."

"Forget about it," I told her. "You should get some rest. We have a long day tomorrow."

"What happens tomorrow?" she asked.

"Well, we're going to have to spend a while in Athkatla and do some digging on the Cowled Wizards. If we can figure out where they keep their prisoners, we can work on retrieving Imoen," I said honestly.

"Then I'll get some rest now. I want to help as much as possible tomorrow," she said smiling. I smiled as well.

"I may just take my own advice as well," I said as we both walked up to our room. As we entered, I had a bit of a shock. There was only one bed. "What is this?" I said angrily. "I specifically asked for two double beds and one single bed! Oh well. Can't be helped now I suppose. You take the bed. I'll sleep on the floor." Aerie's eyes widened.

"Jeffix! I..I can't do that! I can't, in good conscience, take the bed and let you sleep on a hard floor!"

"I just spent gods know how long locked in a steel cage! I'm perfectly content with sleeping on a floor!" I snapped at her. "Now get in that bed and get some rest!" I turned around and turned back. "I'm sorry, Aerie," I said softly. "That was terrible of me. Gorion would berate me for forgetting my manners in front of a lady. I just have a lot on my mind right now. That's all."

"I understand," she said. Then she did something I did not expect at all. She put her arms around my neck and hugged me, her head falling on my armor's chestpad. Being an human, I stood a good five inches taller than her. I then placed my arms around her back, and it was in that moment that I felt her scars for the first time, and through them, I could feel her pain.

"My wings have been clipped," she whispered. "Oh, I wish you could understand how it feels to be bound and chained to the ground, like a miserable prisoner of earth."

"What was it like to fly, Aerie?" I said quietly, still hugging her.

"Oh…it-it's so hard to describe." She paused, took her head off my chest, thought for a moment, then continued. "It's the ultimate freedom, to soar above the clouds and become part of the wind, itself. I remember I used to be so happy. The clouds are a special place up there, Jeffix… It's like a land of billowing white beauty that you can almost walk upon."

"Sounds magical. Flying's one thing I've only ever done once," I told her with a smile.

"You've flown before?" she asked bewildered.

"Sort of," I said. "I was wrangling a wyvern and it took off into the air for a few seconds before I brought it down." She giggled. "What?" I asked.

"You say that as if it was a hobby, that's all." I smiled. "I know I only joined you a day ago but I think you really are amazing," she said.

"Well, thanks but I'm just lucky, that's all," I replied hoping maybe she might get that I was referring to two things at once. Whether she did, I couldn't tell. "You should get some sleep now," I said.

"Oh...okay," she said with a bit of disappointment in her voice. She let go of my neck and lay down on the bed. I sat in the armchair next to the bed and winked at Aerie as she pulled the blanket up to her neck. She smiled and closed her eyes. I placed my sword, my bow, and my dagger on the floor, blew out the candles and closed my eyes.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

I had a lead. The man of mysteries, Gaelan Bayle, said he could enlist the help of his "friends" who were apparently some powerful organization within the city that I knew nothing about. Judging by the amount Gaelan would charge me for their assistance, whatever they do must be illegal.

20,000 is a lot of money, but Gaelan's nephew Brus told me that there's a boy from the Umar Hills in the Government District looking for a ranger like me to help out his village. After finding him, we learned his story and headed out to the hills to find his village. We all stopped to rest in a clearing in a forest that night. Yoshimo lit a fire, Minsc sat down and played with Boo again, and Jaheira stood away from the rest of us, still brooding over Khalid.

She'd begun talking to me about it but that really didn't tell me much, since Jaheira's fighting prowess was matched only by her ability to remain stoic in the face of almost anything, even extreme grief. I'd previously decided that I wouldn't initiate any conversation about the subject until she felt like it. I was going to ask Minsc to help me hunt for tonight's dinner but he had already fallen asleep with Boo in his hands. I thought I'd just have to go by myself but then I saw Aerie sitting alone by the fire Yoshimo built. "Want to come with me?" I asked, my hand extended.

"Um, okay," she said timidly as she took my hand as I pulled her up. "Where are we going?"

"Into the woods," I said. "We need to get something to eat and I get lonely by myself."

She smiled, seemingly happy that she could cure my loneliness. I took her hand and we wandered into the woods. She lifted the skirt of her robe to avoid getting twigs caught in it. Her other hand held mine as we walked down the trail with me keeping my eyes open for a deer or other wild game. She kept her eyes on me, however. She finally asked, "Have you ever heard of my people? The Avariel?"

I turned to face her. "The winged elves? Very little. I thought they were all gone."

"Most of us were," she began, "according to what I remember my mother telling me. Killed by dragons before the First Flowering. But some of us still survive in isolated places. My own people live high in the mountains to the far south, in a place called Faenya-Dail, separated from contact with others. It is...was...a grand and majestic place. My memory is dim, but whenever the thought of it crosses my mind, my eyes still blur with tears."

"Tell me more about your people, Aerie," I said while still leading her through the forest.

"Our...our homes were open places of marble pillars and vistas from which you could watch the entire mountain range below. There was no place you could not spread your wings... We cherished the wind and the rains...we breathed in life, Jeffix, and lived in peace with each other. There were distinct societies among us, as I remember. There were...great aerial warriors who defended us, possessing glass weapons that radiated in the sunlight... And my own class pursued art and knowledge, building the great buildings and filling them with glorious wonders. It...it was... ...I am sorry, Jeffix, I can speak of it no longer. I think of my lost home and I am reminded of my poor uncle Quayle. It...it simply wrenches my heart..."

I squeezed her hand. "I know how you feel. I lost my home and I can never go back. Now I have no choice but to find a new one."

"I'm sorry," she said. "I guess I don't know your story. I've been too busy telling you mine."

"Did I ever say I didn't want to hear your story?" I said with a smile. "Don't be sorry. It's okay."

"Why don't you tell me about your home?"

"Candlekeep? Okay, I guess..." I stopped.

"What's the matter?" Aerie asked.

"Shh! Look over there." I had spotted a wild deer, a doe, not ten feet away. "That will work perfectly to feed five of us!" I exclaimed. I then readied my bow and knocked an arrow. I was about to let the arrow fly when another creature stepped out of the bushes. It was a young fawn, obviously the child of the doe. he went to his mother and she leaned her neck down and nuzzled the fawn's nose.

"Awww..." I heard Aerie whisper. I slackened my arrow. I had always had a soft spot for kids.

Suddenly, I heard growling from the bushes where the fawn had emerged. I redrew my bowstring. Sure enough, a white wolf leaped from the bushes and lunged at the young deer. I stood up and fired one shot at the wolf. It collapsed on the ground, its life now over. The doe had already placed herself between the wolf and her child and looked confounded at the sight of her assailant now dead on the ground. I stepped out of the bushes so the deer could see me. I placed my bow on the ground and stood there. I reached for Aerie's hand and pulled her up to stand next to me.

The doe looked suspicious of us. I pulled an apple out of my pack and extended my hand to her. She inched close enough to smell the fruit in my hand, then took a bite of the apple. I knelt down to offer some to the young deer. He approached me eagerly and bit out of the apple. I stroked the fawn's head as he ate. I turned my head to Aerie. "Here, come try feeding him," I encouraged her.

"What? I can't do that!"

"It's okay. Look at me," I smiled. She knelt down beside me and I handed her another apple. The fawn turned to try and eat the new one in her hand. Aerie slowly put her hand on the fawn's head and began to stroke it while he munched on the apple. After a minute, I saw her worried look turn into a smile.

She began to giggle. "I would never have thought I could get any animal to eat out of my hand. I guess I have your ranger skills to thank for that."

I smiled. "Why don't we leave them be? We still need to find something for dinner."

"Okay," she said. "Bye, little one!" She took my hand as I picked my bow back up and we wandered again into the forest. The two deer walked away in the opposite direction. I picked up the carcass of the wolf I shot and slung it over my shoulder.

* * *

><p>We eventually made it back to camp before it got too dark. I managed to bring home a pheasant and a big one at that. When Yoshimo saw me enter the campground with a pheasant in my left arm and a white wolf on my shoulder, he cocked his eyebrow at me. "Long story," I said.<p>

"Well, as long as I can cook it, I won't ask questions," Yoshimo replied. I handed him the pheasant. Aerie sat back down by the fire while Yoshimo and I cleaned the bird for cooking. Every minute or so, I took a glance back at Aerie just to see how she was doing. Yoshimo must have noticed because he said "So you do anything while you were out?"

"Huh? Sorry, I wasn't listening."

"Anything happen while you were out hunting this thing down?" His voice got quieter. "Say, with a young, innocent, elven lass?"

"I...uh..."

"Aha! Now I've ensnared your attention! Your eyes wander back and forth from her form like a weighted pendulum on a grandfather clock, my friend."

"Am I really that obvious?" I asked.

"Perhaps not to her," he continued, "but with my discerning eyes, I never miss any change in a man's face. Sometimes that can be the deciding factor between whether you live or die."

"Wise advice. I'll have to remember that."

"So what happened? Does it have anything to do with that wolf?"

"The wolf was a complete coincidence."

"Well never mind, I think I can figure it all out myself," he laughed.

I was about to go on but looked back at the carcass I had brought back. "It makes me wonder, though."

"Wonder what?"

"You're from Kara-Tur, so I doubt you've ever seen a wolf like that before."

"You're right. I've never seen a wolf with so white a pelt."

"That is a Winter Wolf. They're pretty common up North in the Sword Coast where I grew up. I've been wondering what one them is doing so far South."

"Haha!" Yoshimo laughed. "You are a strange man, Jeffix. You wonder about everything you encounter," Yoshimo said smiling. "Tell me, how did you get into adventuring? It is a dangerous business as you know. Any one of us could die without a moment's notice."

"I didn't so much get into adventuring as it was forced upon me."

"Forced upon you? What do you mean?"

"A man, who was looking to kill me, killed my stepfather. It was just Imoen and I with no place to call home when I started on the road."

"Tell me more about this man who killed your stepfather."

"His name was Sarevok. He was obsessed with the power of our father, and wished to kill me to prevent me from taking it."

"Who was your father?"

"You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"I have seen many strange things here in this land. I have very little incredulity left in my mind."

I let out a hefty sigh. "As you wish, my father is the dead god Bhaal. He had premonitions of his death before the Time of Troubles, and arranged to have children. Sarevok and myself were the only two that I know of."

"Bhaal? The god of murder?"

"Yes."

"But there could be others? Other children of Bhaal?"

"Why the sudden interest in Bhaal?"

"It is an interesting fate. I wish to hear more."

"Then, to answer your question, yes. There could be other children of Bhaal. I know of none personally, but never gave it any thought 'til now."

"You haven't? Very interesting. We now have something to think on. Thank you," Yoshimo said. "Perhaps now you should get to cooking this thing and keeping your lady-friend some company," he said with a devilish grin on his face. I gave him a friendly punch in the arm.

I walked over to the fire and sat down next to Aerie. "I hope you're not hungry yet because this thing will take a little while to cook," I said.

"Do you know how strange you are?" she asked me out of nowhere. I couldn't tell what she was getting at.

"No," I said. "How strange am I?"

"You and Yoshimo forgot about being quiet over there. I heard about what you are."

"Oh, you mean how I have the blood of a god in me?"

"In particular, a god of murder!" she cried.

"Look, Aerie. I can't help if gods' blood runs through my veins. I don't want it there but I can't do anything about it."

"I know. What is so baffling about you is that with all that evil wound throughout your very being, you're still the nicest and most amazing man I've ever met."

"I am?"

"Of course you are." She got up on her knees and gave me a hug. "It just proves to me how strong and resilient you are." She pulled away from me and said "Jeffix, you're bleeding."

"Hm?" I wiped at my cheek. Sure enough, there were a few drops of blood. But I wasn't cut anywhere. I looked at Aerie's cheek and saw that she had a small cut just below her eye. "Um, you're the one who has a cut."

"Oh? Where is it?"

"Just below your eye. Let me take care of it."

"I am a healer, Jeffix. I can handle one little scratch."

"Yes but I can heal it without an incantation."

"How?" she asked. I then placed my hand close to her face, not quite touching, and my hand glowed blue. Slowly, her flawless skin began to repair itself and the blood receded into her now closed wound.

"Ironically, that's one of the few 'gifts' I've received from my father," I said.

"You continue to amaze me, Jeffix," she said. She let her head rest on my shoulder while I finished cooking the pheasant.

"Let's just hope I don't give you any food poisoning," I joked. She giggled.

Once everyone had eaten and Aerie had fallen asleep, I laid her head down on a bedroll so she could rest comfortably. Then I stood up, looked at the Winter Wolf carcass and said "Now what am I going to do with you?"


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

We reached the Umar Hills the next day. There we spoke to Minister Lloyd, the mayor of the town of Imnesvale. He asked us to look into the recent grisly murders and the disappearance of their ranger. After surveying the town and the surrounding area, we made several discoveries.

First, we met a man who had holed himself up in a cabin up on the Northern cliffs. His name was Valygar, and he told us he was on the run from the Cowled Wizards. They were hunting him to use his body to enter the planar sphere of Lavok, Valygar's ancestor. This sphere had appeared in the slums of Athkatla some weeks ago and since I had no love for the Cowled Wizards myself, I welcomed Valygar to the team. He asked that we eventually take him to the sphere so he can kill Lavok himself. Apparently, the necromancer had been extending his own life by stealing the bodies of his descendants, and since Valygar was the last of his bloodline, I could see why he might be worried.

Second, we questioned an ogre mage by the name of Madulf who had led his band in desertion and now wanted to live in peace. At first, I was suspicious, and could you blame me? He was an ogre! But as we got to talking, I saw weariness in his eyes and a true desire to end his life of fighting. I gave him the benefit of the doubt and surmised that he was not the culprit I was looking for. He even asked me if Minister Lloyd would accept his services as protectors of the hills in exchange for peace and some trade. The minister himself was a little apprehensive about meeting the ogre, but once he did, he could see that these "monsters", as we would so often call them, were peaceful creatures who did not want to kill.

Finally, we checked out Merella's, the missing ranger's, cabin. As I opened the door, I could smell something I would rather have not. Leading to the door from the back of the cabin was a trail of blood. Blood and footprints. Dog footprints. Something had come here and chewed somebody up and dragged them out of the cabin, probably dead or at least unconscious from blood loss. Was it Merella? There was no way to tell. When we entered her quarters, the bed was covered in blood stains and I found a scroll which had a letter written by one Mazzy Fentan. The letter was to Merella and explained that Mazzy and her band had discovered the source of the murders and a crude map drawn on it pointed the way.

That was where we were headed next. I knew it would be a few hours before we reached this place. The sun was beginning to set. It was strange. I thought it was a little too early. No one else seemed to take any notice. Not even Jaheira, who was even more in tune with the state of nature than I was, said anything. I was really getting worried about her. I knew this was her way of coping with Khalid's death but it wasn't doing her any favors. I was about to approach her to talk but someone else beat me to it.

Aerie looked uncertain as to what to say but I'm sure she saw Jaheira in a sulky mood and wanted to cheer her up. I listened in and hoped that Jaheira wouldn't act too harshly toward her. "This... This light makes your hair look really pretty, Jaheira," Aerie said. I winced. Something like that has always been the last thing Jaheira wants to hear.

"Don't be a fool. It does nothing of the sort," she snapped back.

"But-"

"Put your silly romantic notions aside, Aerie. This isn't some childish fantasy, or some grand adventure. Anyone of us could die out here at any moment," Jaheira scolded.

"But we can go to the priests and... and they raise us from the dead, good as new, can't we?" Aerie asked innocently. Another mistake. That really got Jaheira going.

"Sometimes they don't come back! Sometimes some people, no matter how much you love them and no matter what you try to do get... they get taken away. You're young, Aerie. You'll figure it out soon enough." Jaheira picked up her pace to get away from Aerie. She stood still, stunned at how awry her plan had gone.

I walked up to Aerie and put a hand on her shoulder. "I'm sorry she said all that to you," I said.

"I was only trying-"

"I know," I interrupted, "but Jaheira will always be Jaheira. Always stubborn, always feels she must suffer alone. She's not actually angry, just sad. She'll come around one of these days."

"But why does she have to lash out like that?" Aerie asked.

"Her pride and impatience both get the better of her. She was like that to me a lot when we first met."

"Why?"

"Because I was young and inexperienced. The way I acted, she probably would have killed me herself if she hadn't promised Gorion to keep me alive,"

"Jeffix!" Aerie gasped. "You shouldn't say things like that!"

"You didn't know me a year ago when I first set out. I was still a kid, headstrong and overconfident, not to mention annoying. Okay, so maybe there's not much of a difference between twenty and twenty-one, but a lot has happened to me since then. The fact is, Jaheira and Khalid are responsible for helping me become the man I am. Jaheira would yell at me all the time because she wanted me to grow up...fast."

"She wants me to...grow up?" Aerie asked.

"You shouldn't worry about what Jaheira thinks of you, Aerie. I think you fit in very well with all of us. You're a fantastic spellcaster and a very good friend."

"Thank you, Jeffix. I feel better now. I won't worry anymore."

"Good," I said with a smile. "Now I have a present for you."

"A...present?"

"Have a look." I pulled a fur shawl out of my pack and placed it over her shoulders. "It's the pelt from the Winter Wolf I shot a few days ago. I was going to make you a cloak but there wasn't enough actual skin to make something that big so I had to settle for making this. I hope you like it."

"I love it," she said. "It's so warm. Thank you, Jeffix!"

"Jeffix! Aerie!" came a booming voice that could only belong to Minsc. "Boo wonders why you are falling behind and not leading us to righteous victory!"

"Coming!" Aerie cheerily shouted. She ran up to catch up with Minsc. It was nice to see Aerie enjoying herself.

"Aerie, can you not see the sun setting over the tops of the hills?" Minsc asked.

"Minsc, you are almost a giant! I think only you can see the sun now," she replied.

"Then climb aboard Minsc's shoulders and gaze at its wonder!" Aerie accepted and jumped on Minsc's back and sat on his shoulders. Boo peeked out of the little pouch he sat in and scurried up Minsc until he was at the top of his head. He squeaked at Aerie.

"Hello, Boo!" Aerie said. "Did you come to watch the sunset with me?" Boo squeaked again. "You are very sweet, Boo." She held Boo in her hands while Minsc carried them both. I couldn't help but smile. I thought it was rather adorable.

Looking around, I caught Jaheira's eyes. She was glaring at me rather harshly. "Oh, don't give me that look," I said.

"And which 'look' is that?" she pressed.

"The 'you idiot, why do you let this kind of thing happen' look. I would have thought you had gotten tired of giving it to me."

"Indeed. It never seems to do you any good."

"You know Aerie was just trying to cheer you up, right?"

"Well I don't want to be 'cheered up!'"

"You always were a terrible liar."

"Shut up."

"Don't be so hard on her, okay? Yes, she's inexperienced, but if you keep putting dampers on all her hopes, you'll just grow to hate each other."

"I'm content with that."

"Well I'm not."

"I won't apologize to her."

"I'm not trying to make you. I know nothing on the face of Faerûn could make you do that."

"So what do you want?"

"I want you to be more supportive. You eventually warmed up to me. I'm asking you to do the same for her."

"I'll try."

"We're all friends, Jaheira. We have to help each other both on and off the battlefield, otherwise we're just like soldiers, fighting because somebody told us to."

"Now you're going to throw wisdom from your foster father at me? I hate it when I know you're right."

"At least you admit I am right," I said. "By the way, I didn't learn that from Gorion."

"I suppose it was one of Minsc's few moments of wisdom, then?"

"Nope."

"Elminster?"

"Nope."

"Who then?"

"It was Khalid."

Jaheira glared at me for a second. It looked like she didn't believe me, but it was true. Khalid had said those words to me long ago. I stayed silent to show her that I meant it. Her face finally softened as she realized I was telling the truth. She smiled. It was the most minute of smiles, but it was still the first smile I'd seen on her face in days, and I can't quite recall, but I thought I saw what looked like a single tear escape her eye and roll down her face.

* * *

><p>Night had finally fallen. It was a strange night. It did not feel natural. There was no moon and there were no stars. Needless to say, this worried me greatly. The forest we had entered was dark and foreboding, but we had no choice. This is where the map led us. Soon we came across a cave that the two other rangers in the party and I agreed looked very much like the den of a wolf pack. We decided to stake it out to see if these were ordinary wolves or not. Valygar volunteered for the first watch. "I'll keep my eyes peeled for anything sinister," he said.<p>

"And if they spy anything," I added, "make sure the rest of us know before it does."

"Got it," he said before climbing a tree to gain a better vantage point.

Since we were staked out and didn't want anything to see us, we couldn't light a fire. Instead, we just had to bundle our blankets around us to keep as warm as possible. Fortunately, it was still barely autumn so the cold wasn't much to worry about. I wrapped a blanket around me and sat up against a tree. I closed my eyes and began to drift off to sleep.

I dreamt of Candlekeep that night. How long it had been since I had walked within those walls. I saw Imoen before me but she was not herself. She struggled to remember our home and the people who had shaped our lives: Gorion, Khalid, Elminster, Sarevok, even herself. When she could no longer remember herself, her body turned to stone before my very eyes. Irenicus appeared out of the fog and spoke.

"She resists. She clings to her old life as though it actually matters. She will learn."

I faced him and asked "What is the place? What is this all about?"

"It is a portrait of what has happened and what may happen. Do you cling to the past or can you see through the pain?"

What was he talking about?

"You feel the potential within, don't you? Will you cringe from what you know you want? What you can take as your own?"

I know now. He was talking about embracing my heritage, the essence of Bhaal. How did he find out about me, and more importantly, why does he care about it?

"You know what you want. It is you, after all, who has brought us to the dream. Nothing is real...yet."

And with that, I awoke.

* * *

><p>"Jeffix?"<p>

"Huh?" I was still groggy despite my sudden awakening from my dialogue with Irenicus. "Aerie? What's the matter?"

Aerie sat on her knees in front of me. "I couldn't sleep, and I saw you jerk yourself awake. I got a bit worried," she said.

"Well thank you, but I'm fine," I said. "Just a bad dream. Why couldn't you sleep?"

"I guess I'm thinking too much to sleep," she said.

"Thinking about what?"

"I...everyone here seems too unhappy and severe...I am so unused to living this way," she said. "In the circus, we always were cheerful. Or, at least, Uncle Quayle was determined to be. He used to say that a frown would never get anything useful done. I think everyone could use some cheering up... what about you, Jeffix?"

"Heh... you're probably right. If only things were so easy," I said.

"Yes, I suppose your... recent life would leave little to laugh about. One day... one day this will all be over for you, Jeffix. And then maybe we can *all* laugh."

"I will definitely look forward to that day," I said. "It'll be better when I get Imoen back. She's always been good at making people laugh."

"I guess if you're trying to raise a ridiculous amount of money to rescue her, she must mean a lot to you," she said.

"She's been with me since the very beginning. She's always been the one to keep me from going insane. I don't know what I would have done without her."

"You really love her?"

"Of course I do. I never really told her, but I always fancied the idea of having her for a little sister. She was always there for me when we were young and I won't turn my back on her now."

"You sound like you'd make a great big brother," Aerie smiled.

"We used to get into a whole lot of trouble together," I grinned.

"Tell me everything!" she said.

"Well one day, when I was eight, we skipped our lessons and climbed..." I was about to continue but Valygar jumped down from his tree and caught my attention.

"Jeffix! Come quickly!" he whispered. Aerie and I got up and followed Valygar to where we could see the cave. Standing in front of it was a large wolflike creature that stood on two legs.

"What is that thing?" Aerie whispered.

"I have a hunch," I said, "but one way or another, I think it's exactly what we're looking for."

"So now what?" Valygar asked.

"We get everyone else up and go kill us a werewolf."


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Adventuring is something that I've just been accustomed to in the past year or so. I didn't have much of a choice and there haven't been very many enjoyable parts. I remember Gorion telling me once that even if what you do is normally not fun, the people you do it with can make all the difference. In the past couple of weeks, I realize that he was completely right. I did have rather good luck when it came to my traveling companions. Not only were they all great in a fight, but they were all decent people who I could trust with my life.

The sun broke through the clouds as the began to drift away. It had just risen, although we had no way of knowing that. It turns out that the werewolf we found had her pack possessed by a Shade Lord and that was what was causing problems in Imnesvale. We killed the Shade Lord and destroyed his Shadow Altar, which had blanketed the land in a magical darkness. The Shade Lord also had a pet dragon which proved to be a little troublesome. Luckily, my arrows managed to hit its eyes and blind it. Then the rest was fairly simple.

So after wrapping up that adventure, Minister Lloyd offered me the cabin that belonged to their previous ranger. It was actually really nice, and it was mine. We decided to spend a little time in the Umar Hills to make a permanent base in Amn so we could always return if we needed to. It was nice and quiet, and if I didn't have to run around Faerûn all the time, I might have actually thought about living there.

Our next task was to head back to Athkatla to help out Valygar with the giant magical sphere that just appeared there. He said it belonged to his ancestor Lavok Corthala, who extended his life by stealing the bodies of his descendents. I could see why the man was slightly worried.

Valygar held magic in contempt. He made this known to me almost as soon as he joined the party. Apparently his parents had been great wizards and suffered a terrible fate because of it, but Valygar did not delve any further into the matter. Frequently, I caught him staring at Aerie. Valygar always wore an expressionless face, so it was impossible to tell what he was thinking. I decided I would have to approach him about it later.

The sun was setting and we were all packed into the cabin for the night before setting out in the morning. I had stacked the firewood in the fireplace and was about to get the flint to light it when I heard Aerie's voice. "Jeffix! Let me help!"

I laughed. "I just have to light it now, Aerie. Don't worry about it."

"Here, let me light it," she said. "I memorized 'Burning Hands' today!"

My head shot up. "'Burning Hands'? Aerie! Wait!" It was too late. Fire shot from her fingertips at the pyre I'd constructed. I backed away and covered my face from the blast. It lasted for about three seconds, after which my pile of wood had been reduced to ash.

Aerie gasped, so shocked that her plan had gone awry. "Oh no! I...I'm sorry! I wanted to help. I didn't mean to incinerate anything!"

"I'm afraid that's what 'Burning Hands' does," I said, "but don't worry. I'll just go find more wood. That was a good spell, but how about we save it for hostile opponents?"

"I just wanted to help," she said quietly.

"Don't worry. Just promise not to burn anything else until I return, okay?"

"I promise." I then ran outside and into the woods so I wasn't around for what happened next. She told me she sat down feeling disappointed in herself when Valygar approached her and spoke.

"I cannot understand it, Aerie. Why this magic? Why from you, of all people? You are too good and innocent to practice such things."

She looked up at him. "But... but it is who I am, it is how Quayle taught me."

"I know, I know, but... magic corrupts. The very power of magic twists a mage's soul a little each day. There's always one more spell to learn or cast. Before you know it you've spent your life in the library, having never seen the daylight, never truly lived. Believe me, I know this only too well."

"But that is how I was in the circus when I was kept in a... a cage. It was horrible, Valygar, but Quayle came and healed me, healed my sores where... He healed where my wings came off. He taught... He taught me magic, and it freed me. It's not spells that change people. Good people do good things."

"I hope you're right, Aerie. For your sake and mine." Valygar walked off leaving Aerie alone.

Aerie felt so useless and so disappointed in herself. Nobody had any faith in her. Nobody thought she was worth anything. She got up, left the cabin, and headed into the woods on her own.

* * *

><p>I was in the middle of the woods trying to find more dead wood to burn. I wasn't having much luck. I may have cleared out all the dead wood in the forest before Aerie burned it to ashes. As I thought that, I realized she was just trying to help and I shouldn't resent her for it. She got enough of that from Jaheira. I pushed branches out of the way and kept walking with my eyes turned toward the ground, looking for dead wood. Suddenly I noticed a pair of footprints in the soft ground. They looked like pretty standard boots so it could have been anyone. I decided to follow the trail and see where it led me.<p>

When the trees finally diverged, I was standing on the bank of a large stream facing the cliffs just outside of Imnesvale. Immediately to my left were the boots that made the footprints. I also found an orange robe folded up next to them and something else I recognized, the wolf shawl I gave Aerie. Nothing was torn so there wasn't a struggle. Did she go for a dip in the stream? I looked around for any signs of movement under the water.

I was beginning to get worried when I couldn't see her at first. Suddenly, I saw her head poke above the water in the middle of the stream. I breathed a sigh of relief. She was all right. As soon as my worries passed, I realized she was naked and I should not be looking right at her. I decided to retreat back into the forest and listen for if any danger appeared. I turned my back and sat down against a tree facing away from the stream.

After a while, I heard a few quiet splashes as Aerie exited the water. I decided I should make myself known. "Aerie?" I said out loud, still concealing myself. I heard her gasp. "Don't worry," I said. "It's only me."

"Where are you?" she asked.

"I'm hiding behind the tree until you're fully clothed," I said. "I followed your trail hoping nothing had happened."

"You... you tracked me?"

"Of course I did," I said. A few silent seconds passed. "Is everything okay?" I asked. "Why did you leave the cabin?"

"I... I just needed to get away for a little while," she said.

"We should get back," I said, beginning to stand. "The minister invited us all to a big feast to celebr-" I stopped. I had stood a little too soon. Aerie was still fixing the top half of her robe. Her back was turned to me and for a split second, I saw her scars. Whoever had done the amputation did a terrible job. They were dark and jagged and with one very short look at them, I could see and sense everything she had gone through in her time as a captive.

"Jeffix?" She turned around and looked at me, now completely under her robe. She saw the pained look in my eyes. I wanted to hug her and tell her how sorry I was.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I got distracted. Come on, let's go back and get ready for the feast. I can look for firewood tomorrow." She nodded and began to walk back ahead of me.

* * *

><p>The feast was excellent. The citizens of Imnesvale were very happy indeed that we had saved their village from the Shade Lord, and as such, made the best feast imaginable. Only one thing kept me from enjoying it fully. I kept looking at Aerie, who ate quietly and kept her head low. She didn't look like she was having fun at all. After the feast, music began playing and people began dancing. Aerie sat on a chair in the corner of the room, avoiding talking to anybody. Finally, she got up and walked out of the inn. I headed out after her.<p>

"Aerie?" I called her name. Night had fallen and I am not gifted with infravision like elves are. "Where are you?"

"Over here," I heard her voice almost whisper. I found her sitting down against one of the posts in front of the inn.

"What's the matter?" I asked her. "You should be having fun with the rest of us." She looked at me but didn't answer. "If you don't want to tell me, that's fine," I said as I sat down next to her, "but at least let me stay here and keep you company."

"Okay," she whispered.

"What's bugging you?" I asked her.

"You saw me today in... in the stream, didn't you?"

"I... picked up your trail and found you there, yes. I did my best to keep my distance and did not look once I knew you were okay. I didn't want to offend you in any way."

"So you... you saw them?"

"I... I don't... Aerie, what's the matter?"

"I... I have been looking at the scars... on my back. The stumps that were... that were once my wings. They do not... they do not make me truly homely, do they? Am I... am I ugly to you?"

"Have some backbone, girl," We both turned our heads and saw Jaheira standing there with her arms crossed in a disapproving manner. "Do not wilt like a flower and expect him to pick you up. Have some respect for yourself."

"I was j-just asking for his opinion," Aerie said shocked. "Is that so bad, Jaheira?"

"I suggest you forget your scars, child. Life has treated you harshly, but it will be harsher, still, if you cannot get over your loss."

"I... I don't..." Aerie stuttered. Jaheira sighed and walked back inside. She gave me a look that said '_You're on your own'._ Aerie's cheeks turned red. She turned back to me but kept her eyes pinned to the ground. "It was silly of me to ask you, Jeffix. I just... respect your opinion. I have no idea what I look like... to men."

I cupped her chin with my gloved finger and raised her eyes to meet mine. "It would take far more than a couple of scars to hide all the other beauty you possess, Aerie," I gently said.

"R-really? You are... very kind to say so, Jeffix." She looked down before standing up and taking a few steps away. I stood up and stood behind her. "I... I suppose I am too proud, that I miss my white wings so. When I was first enslaved, I was kept in a small cage and put on display. I had no room to stand, much less stretch my wings."

She turned back around to face me and she looked as if she were about to cry. "I... I tried to warn my captor, I pleaded to him... but my wings withered and became bloody and diseased. Until, finally, he was forced to..." She let herself fall against me, her head landing on my shoulder and her hands to my chest as I tried my best to comfort her, "to... saw them off. It was... it was so painful and horrid! I've felt like a great part of me has been missing ever since. I am incomplete. I... do not feel beautiful, Jeffix. Not anymore."

"You've placed too much of yourself in your wings, Aerie. You have to look at the rest of yourself and find beauty in that, too."

"It is... very hard for I shall try to think as you say... and I thank you for your kind words."

"Aerie, is this really what has been bothering you this whole time?" I asked. "Because you needn't worry. I have seen your scars and they do not make me think any less of you. Quite the opposite, I admire you very much for enduring such an ordeal. Not only are you strong to have lived through it, but you are still very beautiful. Your scars do nothing to hinder that."

"Thank you, Jeffix," she said.

"And if you ever feel this way again, I want you to tell me. I don't want you to feel like you're inadequate in any way, because you aren't."

"Thank you. Talking to you had made me feel much better."

I let go of her and said "I don't suppose you would want to rejoin the party?"

"I think I'd rather avoid such a loud place," she smiled.

"Would you like to go for a walk before going back to the cabin?" I asked?

"Yes, I would like that," she smiled, taking my hand. "I found a very nice spot in the woods today. I'll show it to you."

"Lead the way, my lady," I said.


End file.
